I just finished reading ‘The Vow’ yesterday. The movie is on my to watch list. Typically, I am not a fan of romance. Most definitely not the sappy emotional kind. If I indulge in romance it has to be a comedy or something kitschy out of Bollywood. The reason I ended up reading this book is because it was on a $0.99 special sale, and I bought it. But that is not all. If I’m completely honest, I must admit I was intrigued and fascinated. It is one thing to read love stories or watch them. They’re pure fiction. You see them, feel good and then you dismiss them. Something is different when it is real though. In an era where divorce rates have sky rocketed and no one works anything out anymore, it is heartwarming to know that there are still people out there who take their vows seriously. I’m not a fan of marriage, but it is the kind of stuff that restores your faith in humanity. I mean who can stand by someone who has absolutely no recollection of their courtship and marriage.
The story of Kim & Krickitt Carpenter really did warm my heart. It wasn’t an amazing read by any means, but it did make me smile. They are one swell couple, and it feels good to see people happily together. But one thing really bothers me. Not just bothers, I’d say it downright makes me furious. The stars of this love story aren’t Kim and Krickitt, but God. It is all nothing but God’s orchestrated play of life. I respect the sentiments of people who place their faith in God. I consider myself a person of faith; but, some aspects of faith, I will never understand. I can understand crediting God with miracles when medical science gives up. There is no way Krickitt should have survived that accident. There is no way she should have recovered to a full healthy lifestyle. The ER doctors were sure she was a goner, and rightly so. I can see why people tend to overlook the effort of medical personnel and credit God’s miracles.
However, medical science and anomalies are one thing, personal emotions is something completely different. I’ll never understand how people credit/blame God for their accomplishments/failures in life. Relationships especially are something which I mark as my own personal realm. There are no external forces shaping my emotions and actions. It is just me. If I’m with someone, it is because I want to be with them, not because it is God’s plan. Precisely why I don’t get marriages. I don’t want to make vows because of ritual or God. My promises won’t be sacred because of God’s witness. If I take those vows it is because I want to. They will be sacred because they will come from deep within me. Maybe I am selfish, but if I was Kim, I could never credit God for everything. He’s obviously head over heels in love with her. His universe revolves around her. I don’t see his ability to stand by Krickitt as God’s doing, but the act of a man who’s crazy in love, the act of a man with passion and integrity. I’d rather place my faith in humanity than God.
I don’t consider myself an atheist. But my faith has always been different. I tend to see the miracles and magic in human resilience, human will and human emotion rather than God. I want the assurance that the events of my life are the doing of me and the people in my life, not some higher power. And when people love me or want to be with me, I want it to come from their hearts, deep within them. Love me for what you want, I’ll love you for what I want, let’s not insult our feelings by making them part of some plan.